I watched a movie on Netflix last week called Twinsters. It is a documentary about two women, adopted from South Korea, by separate families, and raised on different continents who find each other through social media and discover that they are identical twins. This writing today is not about this movie - though I do recommend that you watch it, it is very good. It is about a quote from the movie that one of the twins says towards the end. It is the twin who grew up in France and she says Le mieux est l'ennemi du bien, The best is the enemy of the good.
It was around a time in the film where there was so much joy and connection yet still some unanswered questions (I don't want to go into detail in case you want to watch, not that it's a thriller or anything and I will ruin the plot but still....) And Anaïs, the French twin, recognized that looking for the the things that are still not settled is taking her away from the incredible things that she already has (My words, not hers).
And this idea, it stuck with me the entire week. And over and over again things came up in my life that resonate with this phrase. Or perhaps because this idea was so deeply settled into my mind, things came up over and over again. Regardless, there is a strong message here.
Because I think that we tend to miss the things that we have because we are always striving for better.
Here's a story, a number of years ago my husband and I were looking at videos of when we were first married. We were up at this farm in New Hampshire that his family owned. It was fall. And I saw myself on the screen and I looked.... well, I looked like I always wished I would look (I know, perhaps not the most deep and spiritually grounded an example but it gets the point across so well!). Because you see, I missed that I looked like that. Strong and fit. Lean. My hair was great. (I may get that haircut again...) But I missed it. Because I wanted better. And so I missed the good. And that is really sad.
Whether it's how we want to look or what we want to do in our careers or how are kids are doing or as simple as how beautiful the day might be, we seldom take the time to appreciate that what is - it is exactly enough. And that even if we can get stronger or make that promotion, or the sun shines brighter in the sky and the wind dies down, this stronger, more successful, warmer place is a new thing, and really has nothing to do with the "good" that we have now.
And so, in keeping with my theme these last few weeks of truly being present in each moment I will add this extra piece. That not only will I settle deeply into where I am is really good.