I've Just Gotta say this
  • Writings
  • About
  • Contact
  • Spotlight Writing
  • Published Writings

And So The Journey Continues

5/17/2015

1 Comment

 
The hardest thing for me, when I am faced with challenges, is that my mind runs ahead of my life.  

I am not good at letting things unfold. I am not good at going with the flow, at sitting in the space that is what is. I want to make it right, right now. And because I can't, my mind gets wrapped up and tangled and then stuck in the tangles in a way that twists and turns around and around and around again. 

It is as though I am on a very complex Mobius strip. Not those beautifully simple ones but a tangle of ribbon that turns in on itself in knots with no end. Just an over and over again path of obsession and despair and worry and sadness. And fear. 

I try to disengage, with the skills I have learned over this lifetime I have lived. And perhaps the lifetimes I have lived before this, too. For these skills that I have, this knowledge and the wisdom that I bring forth this time, it has come with me into this life from other lives that I have lived. This is a truth. And so I am a wealth of information. I have smarts. And skills.  

And I try and disengage from the obsessive attempt to control what is, by using all these tools.  All this knowledge and smarts and wisdom. But even while I do this in one part of my head, there is this other part of me that continues the cycle.  It is like I am split in two. Or more. More than two. Split into many pieces that are not quite integrated and so while parts of me are grounding in my wisdom - in the things I know are true - other parts are spinning along this tangled mess of perseveration.  

One of the things that I have always wished for is peace. Peacefulness. A calm mind but more. An ability to be ok in every moment. And especially in these moments. An ability to let be what is. When I am on my Mobius strip ride I realize I have obviously not mastered this  

And so the journey continues. 

1 Comment
Jen Karofsky link
5/19/2015 10:53:03 am

Sitting in that space can be really difficult and learning ways to sit there can be really important. Sometimes we think the sitting needs to be passive but what if it doesn't? What if it needs to be active? What if we need to breath through it? Or box? Or run? What if, as we sit and it feels all tangled and not right, we learn that some of the other things we are doing in our lives are causing the sitting to be so hard? Like drinking too much? Or eating the wrong foods? Or being around the wrong people? Pay close attention to the times when the sitting is easier and think about why. I believe we do have the answers down deep inside. We just might not be in the right place in our lives to be able to deal with it. And that is part of the journey....

Reply

Your comment will be posted after it is approved.


Leave a Reply.

    Elizabeth Rose

    Mother, Wife, Friend, Sister, Daughter, Dancer, Rower, Runner, Dog and Cat lover.

    Archives

    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed

Copyright 2023
Proudly powered by Weebly
  • Writings
  • About
  • Contact
  • Spotlight Writing
  • Published Writings